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Writers vs. Writers
found in the pursuit of linguistics: Colorless green ideas sleep… 
5th-Oct-2005 04:50 pm
is there no intelligent life on earth?
found in the pursuit of linguistics:

Colorless green ideas sleep furiously
6th-Oct-2005 06:39 pm (UTC)
what if I left off the "to be" and "to me" from the last two lines? Would that make it sound weird, or would that improve it? No, then I run into the repetition of the ending seems in line one of that stanza nnd seem in line 3. Perhaps I need a new word, or to further the line. I'm not sure...*still thinking* That's what I get for just letting the poem go without thinking much about it.

Thanks again, Kat. I miss you!
6th-Oct-2005 09:01 pm (UTC)
you're welcome. that's why dawn calls me the red-pen goddess, I suppose. *grins* I can't help it.

Um... you know what? maybe just leave off the "to me"? it gives the last line a bit of choppy finality, which sounds a little more definitive, without running into the repetition of seem as a line ender.
6th-Oct-2005 11:21 pm (UTC) - Avast!
We wouldn't have our goddess any other way.
6th-Oct-2005 09:02 pm (UTC)
and... I miss you too! we should really keep in contact more :/
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